Meet Boris! A little over a month ago or so, my friend Ryan took his dog Boris to Belle Isle and I tagged along for an impromptu photo-shoot! Now that I am shooting for the band at events, I need all of the practice taking photos of movement that I can get. Boris was a beautiful subject, such a happy guy!

I am thankful for every opportunity I have to do something creative these days, I am constantly starving for the next project. I think there is some fucked up high I get off on by being completely swamped in projects, I am addicted to having a million things going at once. I have been slowly improving these past few months, but I still have moments where I backslide into bouts of anxiety and depression. There are several factors that contribute to it, but more importantly there has been one constant means of development: creativity. I wish several aspects of my life were different, I want things that I know that I do not need, and if this entire year has taught me anything, it is that my mind just isn't ready for everything that my heart is hungry for. As a result? I am going to put all of that energy into something useful, because in the process I am healing myself-with a little help from therapy, and a lot of help from my friends and family. 

"You have people come into your life shockingly and surprisingly. You have losses that you never thought you'd experience. You have rejection and you have to learn how to deal with that and how to get up the next day and go on with it." -Taylor Swift. 

Everything else in my life might still be a mess, but this is the only thing that has made any sense. I have an amazing group of talented people surrounding me right now, and I cannot wait to see what we can come up with together. It is going to be beautiful. I am still spinning plates, still being brave, and it is only the beginning. 

Currently I am parked in front of my laptop with a fan blowing warm air at my face as I keep glancing up at my reflection in the mirror on the back of my closet door. I let my hair air-dry as it is too hot to bother with the blow-dryer, and I am wondering if there is anyway that I can save it in the morning or if I should just dump sea-salt spray on my tresses and embrace the kinky ends and flat roots. The ice has already melted in the giant, orange plastic cup of water I just got for myself mere minutes ago, and my tummy is slightly swollen from consuming a little *too* much watermelon. I am listening to "So Tonight That I Might See" by Mazzy Star for the millionth time, and the anxiety that normally resides in my chest has dwindled down to almost non-existence. I am content. 

These photos, along with the ones from my last outfit post, were taken at Lincoln Street Art Park in Detroit. It is a sculpture park that was built on an abandoned industrial site a few years ago, and it has recently become a hangout place for Mariah and myself. I love it because the sculptures change often and it is never super crowded, although there are bonfires and the like usually later in the evenings. I had first came here back in 2011 for engagement photos, but hadn't been back until early spring of this year with Mariah. 

Lately I have been focusing on creating more good memories to tie into my past ones that were still tender up until a few months ago. It is very easy to slip into the mindset of associating certain places, events, and even music with another person. It seemed that my only options were to avoid these triggers, or to just accept both the good and bad memories and move on. I accepted, but also made the choice to extend them. I may have went to every Weezer concert before last September with my ex, it doesn't mean I have to stop listening to them, or forget all of those wonderful memories. Instead, I remember how amazing those times were, and added to them by seeing them play with friends, and by blasting them at parties. I keep the old memories, but continue to make new ones that are just as amazing. My journey with Weezer, that coffee shop, certain movies and songs are not over, they just have taken a different path. Just like I have. 

On this particular day, my friends and I brought sushi to the park, took a bunch of photos, and people-watched before moving on for the evening. I have recently come to terms with the fact that my brain was very warped for most of my twenties and that my body isn't as bad as I thought it was. As little as two years ago I would have cringed at my thighs and arms, today? I love how these photos turned out. The golden hour + 90's aesthetic? I am one happy Party Cat. 

In other news: I am busy! I still haven't quite figured out the balance between work and play just yet (worst Libra ever), but I am getting there! Also, this blog makes me look so much cooler than I actually am. Honestly, I am sitting in my Doctor Who pajamas and trying desperately to get the Pokemon Go app to quit crashing on me. What a time to be alive! 

Seriously? Seriously.

Crappy servers and bloated tummies aside, I am really starting to feel happy again. The girl who couldn't make plans past the end of the month last year? She is making travel plans for this autumn. I have too many wonderful friends and family members living out of state to not dip my toes into traveling a little more often. I may have not set foot out of Michigan in over two years, but that is all about to change. Indiana, Kentucky, Virginia, I am coming for you! Until then, keep it weird, kittens.