Last week while having lunch with my friend Mariah, we were both discussing how we were a bit bummed because it felt like we were missing out on fall. When I was a kid, fall seemed to last a long time. It felt like after school started, it took FOREVER to get to Halloween. Now, we are just so caught up in those lists of things we want to do, and the things we need to do. 

Nothing stresses me out more than the words "We need to hangout!/We need to see each other more!". Even if I love the person saying it, even if they don't mean an entire day spent together, I cringe inside because it is just one more thing to add to the list. The entire month of October was jam-packed with birthdays and Halloween parties-lots of fun times spent with amazing people! But a lot of other things were pushed aside, and now I am trying to figure out when to schedule doctor/dental appointments, and wondering if I can put off working on our sad-ass garden for another week. At the same time, I find myself craving more and more alone time, so of course this seems like the best time to take up running again. 

After two really bad waves of anxiety trying to figure out when I am going to fit everything/everyone in (as well as some financial issues, because bills are always fun), I made lists. A list of immediate things that need to be taken care of, a list of things that should be taken care of shortly after that, and a list of things I would like to do for myself. I always used to think that putting off spending time with a friend to do something for myself is selfish, but lately I have realized that if I don't take care of myself, I can't be a good person to other people. Who the hell wants to spend time with a giant crabass because she didn't get enough sleep, or is pissy because she has not worked out in over a week and therefore could not let off steam? Kyle, Louie, and the cats are stuck with me regardless, but I really don't want to put anyone else through that. I want to be able to look forward to spending time with  people, not dread it. So occasionally skipping out on a night of drinking to sleep in and go running in the morning is O.K., I just need to remember that. 

 Also, coffee fixes everything. Almost.