Motivation Station

6:26 PM


You wouldn't recognize the girl in the above photo right away, but yes, that is me. I am not sure exactly when this was taken, but I really want to say sometime around 2005. I was over-weight, (I weighed around 165) and extremely unhappy with almost every aspect of my life. I was working at Mc Donald's, a job I hated and would stress me out so much to the point where I would hide in the bathroom and cry. This photo was taken right after my Grandpa had passed away, and the last time I had seen my Grandpa was that Easter. My dad drove both him and my Grandma up to my work to say hi to me before they went home because I could not get the day off so I worked all day instead of visiting with my family, and it was the last time I saw him. I couldn't quit my job because the only thing I had going for myself was my own apartment with Kyle. No job=no rent money. I hid myself in baggy jeans, I never wore shorts or skirts, and I never, ever went to the beach. I wore black a lot, and since we were broke, I ate most of my meals at work. At home, we ate a lot of mac & cheese and take-out because I didn't know how to cook .

Things turned around a little in 2006-2007. I finally quit Mc Donald's and got a job as a cashier at Best Buy. I also got a YMCA membership with Kyle and managed to lose a little of the weight. I started wearing hoodies form Victoria's secret because they covered me up but still felt "nicer" than the plain black ones. After six months, I got my current job at Vesco Oil. I stayed at 155 or so for a few years, still hiding in my hoodies. In 2008, my work held a wellness program where each member would weigh-in weekly on a scale. Whoever lost the most weight, won money at the end of the program, which lasted about 12 weeks. I had a goal of ten pounds, but I managed to lose twenty, putting me at 135. In 2009 I signed up again and lost another ten pounds. When I graduated from OCC, I weighed 120 pounds, pretty much what I looked like in the pictures below:


How did I do this? I became obsessed. I walked everywhere, I cooked healthy dinners, when I ate alone, it was salads & subway. I would walk a five-mile route 3-4 times a week. I did workout videos when it was too cold or rainy and I would do them before Kyle got home because I hated working out in front of people (still do). I kept it off for awhile, Louie's arrival in our lives helped with that because living in the apartment, I walked him at least twice a day if not more.

So what is my issue now? I have a gym membership, I still have Louie, where is my motivation? I had only two classes back in 2009, I have no school now. Granted, I do have a big house that takes a lot of time to clean, and I do have a best friend was living out of state so I barely hung-out with anyone, but still. 

I see friends almost every weekend, and it is healthy. However I realize that I need to get back in shape, and in order to do that, I need to get that same, self-driven attitude back. No more going out on Friday nights for awhile (I am super broke anyway), and I need to move every day again. Everything from going crazy cleaning, to walking Louie, to going to the gym. I have been really good at eating healthier-and I do feel a lot better. I did not have a blog to take up 1-2 hours of my night back in early 2009, but I did spend hours online. I looked up everything from healthy & fit celebs, new workout routines, healthy meals and even songs to add to my workout play-list.

I have even thought of quitting outfit photos until I lost the weight, but I don't want to do that. Taking away something that I enjoy feels like punishment, not encouragement. So, I have decided to add some motivation to this blog. I want to do a few posts on things that make me feel good, that push me and make me want to look my best. I am hoping this kicks my butt into gear, and will prevent me from posting nothing but food posts every single week ;) 

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15 Musings

  1. hiii Sara!!!what difference will become more thin and beautiful

  2. You have to consider how tall you are too. And I think you look great the way you are. Perhaps you should just think how strong you already are and how healthy you want to keep yourself. I know you have a wedding coming up..that's a ton of stress.

    I'm having to give up sugar..due to my mother and her health problems..because, it'll get me..sooner or later..I'm afraid. That means giving up bread,rice, potatoes and even grapes and bananas.

    Anyway, its easy to become obsessed with losing weight. I've been down that road. And because I'm short, that means I have to work twice as hard as the norm when it comes to exercise, well, maybe even more than that. And I know I'll never have a yoga body, but at least I can try..even if its in my own room.

    All the best. Stay strong. Stay you.

  3. You are so brave. I'm wishing you all the best. You are definitely not a procrastinator.

  4. Oh, you are adorable. And you do so much already. All the best on your diet, your house, your relationship and your goals.

  5. omg sara, I never knew your story about how much weight you have lost over the years... this in itself is so inspiring and motivating. Keep your head up, keep posting those amazing food posts, and know that if you have a bad day and don't feel like working out, it isn't the end of the world. You are beautiful and strong and I commend you for wanting more and more from yourself. we should be "motivation" buddies. seriously I think if I get unmotivated, i'm sending you a facebook message... sometimes you just need that extra push or little note to get you going. i know i do. :)

  6. You can do it Sara ! and I'm happy for you that your getting healthy because I'm really trying to do that now too.

    ps I miss hanging with you!

  7. girl, you need to relax. you look fantastic. start exercising more to get healthy and let go of the numbers. it would be really sad if you stopped taking outfit pictures because of that. especially since you are really quite thin. someday you will look back and want to punch yourself for not realizing how freaking beautiful you are. i look at myself at 24-25 years old, before i had two kids, and i am like,holy SHIT i can't believe i thought i needed to lose weight. it was pretty sad actually, to see those pictures and realize that i was so hard on myself during the peak of my youthful attractiveness. don't let this happen to you! haha. anyway, i think the working out part sounds great. have you tried Zumba? i do 45-60 minutes about 5 times a week and it's pretty amazing. i recommend it.

  8. Good luck with working out and getting healthy! Sometimes it can be a tiring process, but the end result can be satisfying. It's something I need to do because my dad got diabetes because of his eating habits and I don't want to go down that road.

    Have you tried SparkPeople? It's a site where you can get free recipes, workout tips and encouragement from other people improving their health.

    I've signed up for it but have yet to actually use it. :P

  9. I used to work at McDonalds when I was in College and I didn't exactly love the job but it's my friends at work that kept me going.

    I feel you. I guess we all have this kind of phase while growing up. I am positive that you will be more than motivated and you've got good friends, a supportive boyfriend and this blog. :)

  10. I think that you are gorgeous now. Forget about the numbers and focus on being healthy. I also totally understand the desire to feel good about the way you look. I've been trying to work out more too, but I don't have a weight goal just a 'be healthier' goal.
    I've been doing some workout from it's got loads of things you can do at home (with no one around) without any equipment. Although all the people on the site have crazy person abs they tend to be supportive of regular people as well.

  11. Do whatever you need to do to make you HAPPY and healthy. Moderation, right? Nothing to the extreme, good or bad. I think you look beautiful and please don't stop posting outfit pics, I thoroughly enjoy them! SELF LOVE, first and matter what you look like. I can only give advice from what I try and live by :)

    Side Note: The best workout music is Britney Spears' Hits lol :)

  12. Missy. I understand you. I've somehow been obsessed with losing weight but in the end I assumed that I'm like a yo-yo and in a year I've passed from 163 to 143 in less than month without doing anything and now that im on a diet I'm catching weight again.

    So focus on the healthy things and remember that you're beautiful no matter what.

    loads of love

  13. What an amazing post, Sara. I applaud your courage for being so candid. It's interesting to hear the thoughts in your head and they make us love you even more.

  14. it's a brave and inspirational post, sara. my support always for you, you're the nicest and cutest girl ever :)

  15. I think you look great now but I can understand always wanting to be thinner. It's an obsession with mine and I've gone up and down with my weight too. Working out takes a lot of time as does eating healthier. You can do it! Once the weather gets better if you ever want to go for walks or bike rides or anything let me know.

    Also, going out Friday nights can be cheap and still good for you. Drink less and dance more! It costs less money, less calories but burns calories. :-)


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